What if we tried out a drummer?

What would people think? Would it be surrender? Would it be victory? Would it hurt? Would we become an option for them while they became a priority for us? Would we become dependent and suffer withdrawals? Would it require larger doses of drums to achieve the same effect after a period of use? Would this be a gateway instrument that caused us to end up begging on the street for spare change to tempt that ace bandeneon player? Would the convention of having a drummer birth other conventions? Would we start doing Meat Loaf covers? Bar Mitzvahs? Would we get in arguments about which ZZ Top albums were REALLY the important ones? Would I go looking for someone like Phil Collins (only because he has worse hair than I do)? What would become of the little synthy bits we use to cover up the 8 beats of count-in starting a song? Why not hire a horn section? Some gospel singers? A !#*%+$^ marching band?
Just wondering...